Men of God Emotionally Crumble - It's Allowed

>Now the men were afraid because they were brought into Joseph’s house; and they said, “It is because of the money, which was returned in our sacks the first time, that we are brought in, so that he may make a case against us and seize us, to take us as slaves with our donkeys.” When they drew near to the steward of Joseph’s house, they talked with him at the door of the house, and said, “O sir, we indeed came down the first time to buy food; but it happened, when we came to the encampment, that we opened our sacks, and there, each man’s money was in the mouth of his sack, our money in full weight; so we have brought it back in our hand. And we have brought down other money in our hands to buy food. We do not know who put our money in our sacks.” But he said, “Peace be with you, do not be afraid. Your God and the God of your father has given you treasure in your sacks; I had your money.” Then he brought Simeon out to them. So the man brought the men into Joseph’s house and gave them water, and they washed their feet; and he gave their donkeys feed. Then they made the present ready for Joseph’s coming at noon, for they heard that they would eat bread there. And when Joseph came home, they brought him the present which was in their hand into the house, and bowed down before him to the earth. Then he asked them about their well-being, and said, “Is your father well, the old man of whom you spoke? Is he still alive?” And they answered, “Your servant our father is in good health; he is still alive.” And they bowed their heads down and prostrated themselves. Then he lifted his eyes and saw his brother Benjamin, his mother’s son, and said, “Is this your younger brother of whom you spoke to me?” And he said, “God be gracious to you, my son.” Now his heart yearned for his brother; so Joseph made haste and sought somewhere to weep. And he went into his chamber and wept there. - Genesis 43:18-30
You needed to read most of the background story…The scene is a follow-up meeting between Joseph and his brothers; well, more brothers. This meeting included one they had previously and conveniently left home at the request of their father and in guilt over the treatment of a previous younger brother, Joseph himself.

Suddenly, Joseph, this now great man, this strong-hearted and efficient prime minister of a mighty nation, collapsed inside. (Did you read until the very end?)
Had the years hardened him? Had he become less emotional as time went on and he had gone through all the ups and downs of life? Had his time with God prepared him for every situation so that he handled them all with calm and reserve?

Hardly.

No, truly great men and women, no different than you and I, are suddenly seized by those times in life when they can no longer restrain the wellspring of emotion surging within them. There is no composure. Their feelings bubble to the top. That's what happened to Joseph at this never expected moment in his very full life. This was a moment that was truly a kingdom moment. It is at such amazing, blessed times that words fail us. And, completely acceptable, as with Joseph we must get alone to regain our composure. Joseph did.
The Scriptures speak,
Joseph hurried out for he was deeply stirred over his brother, and he sought a place to weep; and he entered his bedroom and wept there - Genesis 43:30.

Close your eyes for a moment and picture the scene. With little warning, the handsome, confident leader of millions has turned away from his guests and rushed to his bedroom and collapsed in an uncontrollably sobbing heap! Twenty plus years of pain, heartbreak, loneliness, in a moment, passed before Josephs' eyes. All the loneliness. All the loss. All the seasons and birthdays and meaningful festivals and commemorative times without his family. It was too much to contain, like a rushing river pouring into a lake, swelling above the dam. His tears ran, and he heaved with great sobs. All of a sudden, he was a little boy again, missing his daddy.

There have been times in my own life when I've had doubts, when I've stumbled over great cracks that appeared in my world. Some of those have occurred because of the pain of my past. Many of them because of the pain of my time here and now. I've had those times when I climbed into my own bed and wept, crying out to God. I suspect I am not alone in this. Such times of pain, and despair are part of "Life 101" aren't they? I pray, have you not already done it, realize honesty in your identity, real rather than false or the protection of some kind of super-confident image is more hurtful than it is helpful.

The little verse that is Jude, verse 22 says, "Of some having compassion, making the difference. We can love through it, we can love deeply and in meaningful ways to those with whom we understand. It's comforting to realize we're in good company in times like those that our friend Joseph was going through. Isn't it?

Yes, it is true. Joseph had become a great and powerful man, admittedly, but he was also a real human being with real human emotions, who could step out of the corridors of power and have the strength to weep his heart out. Spending a life that might have destroyed others but spending it in the shadow of the Almighty created just such a man as he.

I remain…
InHISgrip,
~J~